It is a sad reality that relationships don’t always prosper. People break up for several reasons which include frequent fighting over the same reasons, loss or lack of physical attraction, or simply because being together is no longer mutually satisfying. Constant and often unnecessary bickering over petty stuff, diminished intimacy, incompatibility, and the feeling that the relationship is no longer satisfying for both parties are common reasons for breakups. Some people also leave a relationship because their partner have trust issues; are verbally, physically, or emotionally abusive; or overly and needlessly jealous. If the reason for your breakup is any of those mentioned, reuniting with your ex is probably not the wisest decision.

In this article, we will not give you tips on how to get your ex back, instead we will share pieces of advice on how to get over them. But how does one exactly recover from a break up? Breakups and relationships are similar in that they both need time, effort, and commitment. One of the essential steps to recover from a failed relationship is to follow the no-contact rule. By resisting the urge to call or contact your former lover, you are both giving yourselves the time and distance required to start the healing process. The no-contact rule also applies to sexual encounters with your ex, that is, you should not make out with them again. You are just making things worse between the two of you, and both of you will have unclear expectations of the state of your relationship. Also, having sex with your ex is just being desperate, and does not in any way make you more macho. If anything, it makes you look indecisive and weak.

Loneliness can be a very powerful emotion, and with alcohol, it can lead you to do stupid things. So remain alcohol-free or at least drink moderately so you have full control of your faculties to avoid drunk calling. Furthermore, throw out tangible reminders of your ex. Sniffing the pillow where she used to lay her head on is going to delay the recovery time even more.

Also, don’t be too hard on yourself. Hit the gym, go on a vacation if resources permit, or hang out with friends. Find a new hobby or sport to keep you busy and divert your attention. Staying at home and moping around all day thinking of ways how to get your ex back will drive you crazy.

Don’t be so hard on yourself, singlehood won’t kill you. If any, it gives you a lot of time to reconnect with yourself and rediscover the things you liked doing before. Breakups are not the end of the world, you just wish they are. Become active in the dating scene again, and learn from your previous experiences to be a better mate and to find a more compatible partner.